And I'm back... So many things happened, I really have no idea where to start.
I have two kids now
Older one turned 4 last March, and younger one enters the Terrible Twos on September, even though he is already throwing tantrums all over the place for a few months now.
Both kids seem to be late talkers.
Older one finally started talking once he hit three, but we are doing speech therapy any way , just to help him clear up. He has done awesome progress so far. He even seems to like English too, as he easily learned a few words and even can count to 10 in English. He is starting pre-school this September.
Little one has yet to blurt out a word, besides "Dada" He does communicate by pointing pretty well though. We've appointed a speech evaluation right after his second birthday.
All in all , they are good kids, quite active and happy. Always finding way to keep me running. I admit I'm a helicopter mom, mostly because of my anxiety. Def need to work on that and chill out a bit.
My hands have been full. And still are. Two kids, a house to take care of, hubby coming home from work late, away from my friends and family and with no help at all.. Struggling to keep up with everything and me time squished somewhere between midnight and 4am, where I force myself to go to bed. Still, finding it hard to relax and sleep, and usually managing to do so around 6 am.
And the money issues... Paycheck by paycheck would have been nice. We're struggling. Hubby got a serious pay cut 3 years ago. They literally halved his salary. It was supposed to be a temp thing. And it was, in a way. He did get a raise at some point , but still not as much as he used to get payed. I don't want to be ungrateful though. We have my family behind our backs. They might be 200km away, but they are here. My father, my mother and her husband, my uncles, they are all supporting us however they can..
Somewhere between all this, I felt I was loosing myself. I was getting cranky, impatient (and patience is a thing I'm known for), and soo bored. I was bored to even do the things I loved so much like play the sims. Most likely bored with my life I guess. Not that I wasn't happy. I can't say that. It was just all this stress, the everyday routine, not being as creative as I wanted to...they started taking me down
A couple of months back, I forced myself to get up. I have two children and a spouse and this people need ME. My family needs ME. The real me. Not the shadow I was turning into.I HAVE to do something. I started being more active in the community, started playing sims again, and creating houses that I so much loved. What if I started a YouTube channel ? Or streaming ...Nah I don't have and can't afford the hardware or the software to do that. And there was this EA Game Changers program I've been reading about that had lit a fire in me... But how, haven't been active for ages, I'm no youtuber nor streamer. I don't have "the audience" needed..
I started researching. Graveyardgirl started out YouTube with here phone as a camera. LuckeySimsYT had mentioned his low end hardware a couple of times and yet his videos are just fine for me, and really fun to watch. They all started somehow...Why not me?? I kept researching. Seasons released and I managed to upload a couple of builds , before giving in and getting my CC back in my game. I love my CC.
My builds are usually loaded with CC and I hate linking them. So I can't really upload them. I could start that YouTube channel I was thinking about and do speed builds or walkthroughs of them. But would people be interested if I didn't list my CC? I did a poll on twitter about it. The results came back , with the whooping amount of two votes, that they didn't really mind... OK convenient result , low number of voters though.. not enough to push me to actually do something
And then it happened....As I was checking my email, I see it ... It's an invite to join the Game Changers Program. I don't know how, I don't know who. All I know is that as soon as I opened it, I blurted out "OMG YES!" I felt all warm and fuzzy, I felt so much energy , like it opened my eyes to see that I CAN do something. I can get up and take a step forward. It was the push I so much needed.
I downloaded OBS, and Filmora. treated myself with a nice razer set of head phones and microphone (cheap but for now its ok), checked out a few tutorials and ...oh wait I somewhere have a blog too
And here I am writing down those lines, trying to figure out my plans better. Looking back , not that back really, where I was, where I am and where I want to be.Hoping that someone might read this , and get the push they need to get back on their feet and take the next step forward. Because in the end you can do whatever you want or at least something similar (I'd love to work at EA in The Sims, but yea that's a few hundreds of miles away) all you have to do is keep your eyes open and let NOTHING get you down.
As for this blog, I'm planning to be more active from now on, I'm just moving things around a bit, adding new links, killing old ones, so bare with me until I've set everything up and running. The blog seems to be the easiest of all of what I'm trying to accomplish, but as I'm starting up again from almost ground zero don't expect any fireworks just yet. Taking minor steps slowly and carefully. At least now they are going forward.
If anyone actually reads this...Cheers, patient reader , kudos for reading all that essay of nonsense. To you. Cause for me it was a weight on my chest that I had to lift. Thank you for helping me with that.
See ya!!! (Soon hopefully)
I have two kids now
Older one turned 4 last March, and younger one enters the Terrible Twos on September, even though he is already throwing tantrums all over the place for a few months now.
Both kids seem to be late talkers.
Older one finally started talking once he hit three, but we are doing speech therapy any way , just to help him clear up. He has done awesome progress so far. He even seems to like English too, as he easily learned a few words and even can count to 10 in English. He is starting pre-school this September.
Little one has yet to blurt out a word, besides "Dada" He does communicate by pointing pretty well though. We've appointed a speech evaluation right after his second birthday.
All in all , they are good kids, quite active and happy. Always finding way to keep me running. I admit I'm a helicopter mom, mostly because of my anxiety. Def need to work on that and chill out a bit.
My hands have been full. And still are. Two kids, a house to take care of, hubby coming home from work late, away from my friends and family and with no help at all.. Struggling to keep up with everything and me time squished somewhere between midnight and 4am, where I force myself to go to bed. Still, finding it hard to relax and sleep, and usually managing to do so around 6 am.
And the money issues... Paycheck by paycheck would have been nice. We're struggling. Hubby got a serious pay cut 3 years ago. They literally halved his salary. It was supposed to be a temp thing. And it was, in a way. He did get a raise at some point , but still not as much as he used to get payed. I don't want to be ungrateful though. We have my family behind our backs. They might be 200km away, but they are here. My father, my mother and her husband, my uncles, they are all supporting us however they can..
Somewhere between all this, I felt I was loosing myself. I was getting cranky, impatient (and patience is a thing I'm known for), and soo bored. I was bored to even do the things I loved so much like play the sims. Most likely bored with my life I guess. Not that I wasn't happy. I can't say that. It was just all this stress, the everyday routine, not being as creative as I wanted to...they started taking me down
A couple of months back, I forced myself to get up. I have two children and a spouse and this people need ME. My family needs ME. The real me. Not the shadow I was turning into.I HAVE to do something. I started being more active in the community, started playing sims again, and creating houses that I so much loved. What if I started a YouTube channel ? Or streaming ...Nah I don't have and can't afford the hardware or the software to do that. And there was this EA Game Changers program I've been reading about that had lit a fire in me... But how, haven't been active for ages, I'm no youtuber nor streamer. I don't have "the audience" needed..
I started researching. Graveyardgirl started out YouTube with here phone as a camera. LuckeySimsYT had mentioned his low end hardware a couple of times and yet his videos are just fine for me, and really fun to watch. They all started somehow...Why not me?? I kept researching. Seasons released and I managed to upload a couple of builds , before giving in and getting my CC back in my game. I love my CC.
My builds are usually loaded with CC and I hate linking them. So I can't really upload them. I could start that YouTube channel I was thinking about and do speed builds or walkthroughs of them. But would people be interested if I didn't list my CC? I did a poll on twitter about it. The results came back , with the whooping amount of two votes, that they didn't really mind... OK convenient result , low number of voters though.. not enough to push me to actually do something
And then it happened....As I was checking my email, I see it ... It's an invite to join the Game Changers Program. I don't know how, I don't know who. All I know is that as soon as I opened it, I blurted out "OMG YES!" I felt all warm and fuzzy, I felt so much energy , like it opened my eyes to see that I CAN do something. I can get up and take a step forward. It was the push I so much needed.
I downloaded OBS, and Filmora. treated myself with a nice razer set of head phones and microphone (cheap but for now its ok), checked out a few tutorials and ...oh wait I somewhere have a blog too
And here I am writing down those lines, trying to figure out my plans better. Looking back , not that back really, where I was, where I am and where I want to be.Hoping that someone might read this , and get the push they need to get back on their feet and take the next step forward. Because in the end you can do whatever you want or at least something similar (I'd love to work at EA in The Sims, but yea that's a few hundreds of miles away) all you have to do is keep your eyes open and let NOTHING get you down.
As for this blog, I'm planning to be more active from now on, I'm just moving things around a bit, adding new links, killing old ones, so bare with me until I've set everything up and running. The blog seems to be the easiest of all of what I'm trying to accomplish, but as I'm starting up again from almost ground zero don't expect any fireworks just yet. Taking minor steps slowly and carefully. At least now they are going forward.
If anyone actually reads this...Cheers, patient reader , kudos for reading all that essay of nonsense. To you. Cause for me it was a weight on my chest that I had to lift. Thank you for helping me with that.
See ya!!! (Soon hopefully)
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